...why you were in the place you are? Why you're a SAHM, or a WAHM? Why you spend your days wiping faces and butts instead of punching keys and numbers? Why you punch keys and numbers instead of cleaning toilets or making beds?
I do. I wonder a lot about why I'm not doing what I thought I'd be doing now. 20 years ago, I would have told you that I'd be a famous actress with 10 kids and two novels behind me. I wanted to act, to write, and to be a mommy. I wanted to be a chauffeur to the stars, I wanted to write songs for singers, I wanted to make a difference. I wanted to be a teacher, I wanted to be a doctor, I wanted to be everything. With all the choices I had, instead, I became indecisive. I became a wanderer. I'm a bouncer. I get bored easily, I change jobs constantly because I'm always looking for something that I'm good at.
I haven't found my niche. Shouldn't I have found it already? I take photos, I take care of children, I am a cashier, I am a driver, a blogger, an aunt, a movie critic, a yo-yo dieter, a friend, an auntie, a freelance poet, a human.
But, I am clueless. I want everything. I cannot settle, I'm picky. Does that mean there's something wrong with me? I just don't know what I want to be when I "grow up". I'm going to be 31 in a few months, and I just feel....STUCK.
Well, that's my blog for today...I was going to tell you the things that bother me, but that would take all night. However, I would like to share a few.
1. I hate that magazines make money by printing lies, or half-truths about celebrities.
2. I hate that celebrities are not easily reached. I would love to just be someone's friend because in my opinion, true friendships are hard to come by in Hollywood.
3. I hate that people get upset and blame others for their moods.
4. I hate it when people throw trash on the ground.
5. I hate it when people throw obscenities around because they've got nothing better to say.
Okay...I love the majority of people. I see the good in everything. And, I'm glad to be alive.
I'm done rambling now. When I've got a purpose for a blog, I'll write some more.
